It took until episode 11 of RHOS, but we finally found out why Nicole and Athena don’t get along. Athena’s regression therapy revealed that back in 1793, when Athena was a man called Yakavos, Nicole (his best friend) lied and betrayed Yakavos and stole his wife, Katia.
No wonder Athena thinks Nicole’s a painsack!
Why does Athena get on with Lisa so well? Lisa is Yakavos’ daughter from his relationship with Katia. Of course, now it all makes perfect sense.
A slightly bizarre start to the episode, and things got stranger when Matty was asked to be Maid of Honour at a wedding between a dog and a cat. ‘Oh. My. God.’ Was Matty’s response – and ours too.
Still reeling from the barking mad invite to the pet wedding Matty said, ‘When you’ve got crazy friends, crazy things happen.’ Later, we saw exactly what she meant at the explosive wedding reception.
Before that, Victoria and Mel had a catch up at the Ivy for a few drinks and an Athena focused gossip session, while Athena herself organised ‘Breakfast at Levendi’s’.
There was no invite for Victoria (shock) and Mel and Matty couldn’t make it, which was a shame because Athena was at her best. The Breakfast at Tiffany’s-inspired event looked amazing and the girls loved playtime with the jewellery in the store, including a $450,000 ring. Wow! But the best was to come as Athena announced she was, ‘Having an Oprah moment!’ and gave Lisa, Krissy and Nicole beautiful watches. Double wow!
‘Offering you this Lavendi watch is not about buying your love,’ Athena said, and we believed her. Surely nobody could pick holes in this lovely gesture? Step forward, Victoria.
Nicole, Krissy and Victoria were trying Aerial Yoga, which was a bit of an excuse for Krissy to drop ‘It’s been a while since you got your legs up’ jokes. It was also a chance for Victoria to slam Athena’s ‘man’s watch’ gift and make Nicole feel bad for taking a gift from an ‘enemy’. At this point, Nicole didn’t even know she’d stolen Yakavos’ wife.
Then it was time for what had to be the biggest, most glamorous cat/dog wedding of the century. And, quite possibly, the only one. Frost the cat and Charlie the dog was a purr-fect match, apparently, as canine elite and feline high society were married off as a way of advocating gay weddings.
When Frost took Charlie as his ‘Pawfully wedded wife’ it was a touching moment that even had Lisa reaching for the tissues. ‘I’m gonna vomit!’
Unfortunately, the wedding reception saw the biggest catfight we’ve ever seen – and it wasn’t Frost’s feline family with their claws out.
No, the trouble started when Athena and Lisa tried to drop Krissy in it with Matty. To cut a long story short, AthLis was suggesting that Krissy had said Matty had slept with the man who painted her picture.
Matty didn’t believe them and turned on Lisa and Athena instead. Things were getting a bit nasty and shouty, but surely things couldn’t get any worse? Oh, Hi Victoria!
‘The kiss of Judas,’ Athena said OUT LOUD as Victoria said her hellos.
Where were we? Oh yes, fight time! Lisa and Athena were clearly looking for a row but they probably hadn’t reckoned on Matty unleashing full Persian Power! One snarky comment and a push too many, and Lisa was wearing a glass of champagne as Matty went ballistic, smashed a glass, swore a lot and stormed out.
So far in this series of RHOS, we’ve had an assault with a deadly napkin, a cape drowning, a couple of champagne soakings – but nobody expected a glitter bomb attack.
Seriously, where on earth did that one come from, as Athena turned Krissy into an Oscar lookalike with a dusting of gold glitter.
Maybe that’s why the ‘where are they now?’ summary before the credits revealed that Krissy has resumed the role of a trophy wife. Mel is looking for acting opportunities, Lisa is giving her marriage another go and Matty wants to get a dog – despite the cat/dog wedding fiasco.
Nicole ‘Captain Eyebrows’ O’Neil is focused on her charity work and raising eyebrows with her 8.5 carat diamond ring and Victoria is planning to meet up with her new sis soon.
The last word, of course, went to Athena. ‘You can give strawberries to pigs but they will never be appreciated’. Very deep. Athena is continuing her path to reincarnation but interestingly doesn’t want to return as a ‘goddess of war ‘again.
Which is such a shame – Athena’s so good at causing conflict!
Love your 8th housewife xxxx